Let’s set sail

That was the time I didn’t woke up.

I have always lived with unconventional schedules, I only moved nimbly in the darkest hours, when I remained her last guardian. I heard her coming as the rumours faded out in the streets and the sounds of the cars hurtling to their garages became less frequent. I perceived her pungent smell, and I softly got comfortable in her secret corners unveiled by then, so intimate and restful; I found there my place. Before witnessing morning dethroning her, I said goodbye with proper remonstrance, and tacitly I was grateful, in our conspirational silence, for her comeback. It was about giving and achieving, at par. The night and I.

That was the time I betrayed her.

I stayed up late talking, discussing with her. I asked her why. Why did she show me Love, to later mutate herself into the cruel niche of its betrayal? Why did she cradled those two unfaithful bodies somewhere else, while I thought she was my only ally? Why did she mislead me with a wrong affection?

I did not feel safe anymore, I felt compelled, suffocated. I didn’t believe her any more, I feared her.

At this point, we turned into prison guard and prisoner. The night and I.

I desired revenge and I was ready for it.

So I watched and waited.

And slowly… it came.

The dim light came, and I saw her die.

That was the time I knew the dawn.

The most precious gift. The most enlightening revelation. The most exclusive secret: rebirth. The window was not enough, I ran outside; neither the porch was enough, I went past it; the street was too distant, I rushed to the seaside… But it still looked like a limit.

The morning sun shone like gold over the smooth cloth of silk of the sea. Once again, this was not enough. I closed my eyes for an indefinable time, when I opened them again, the sparkling cloth of silk had been cut through by a departing fishers’ boat. It looked like wound. Like mine. I called them aloud, apologizing to the seagulls for having interrupted their laughs, and implored them to take me away.

Was enough.

I set sail towards the day. I want to reach horizon to touch it.

Love, join me with daylight, now I’m ready.

Love, open my sails, I never understood it, freedom, before now.

When at the end of my journey I’llrediscover you, you might be all ears, and I might be a shell.

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